One day you’re baking banana bread and making a start on a free online course about ancient Greek mythology. The next you’re laying horizontal for six hours, laptop burning into your curled up thighs whilst watching Saved by the Bell compilations on YouTube, chest covered in crumbs from aforementioned banana bread.

This is the never-ending yet ever-changing lockdown. It started with WFH, Tiger King and a loo roll drought. It segued into social distancing, sourdough starters and @connellschain. Now we’re in Covid purgatory, caught between the clarity of a strict lockdown and the tantalising carrot of normal life.

It is becoming evident that not only will our “new normal” roll on for many months to come, but it may also be revoked overnight and replaced with curfews and curtailments. We are adrift in a sea of uncertainty. The only vaguely certain truth is that we will be in the grips of austerity when we do finally emerge bleary eyed from this Orwellian existence.

Sounds a bit bleak doesn’t it?

Well, if you can’t look forward to anything, you may as well look back. Here are five observational reflections on the past few months:

  1. I have been confronted to find that the fact I haven’t cleaned my oven in four years has not been a time-related issue but more of an inclination deficit.
  2. The British pastime of orderly queuing is serving our nation extremely well as we acclimate to lining up outside Waitrose.
  3. Introverts are currently thriving, running on full social batteries that are not being consistently depleted by human interaction and the exhaustion of swerving social invitations.
  4. TikTok content should not be created by anyone over the age of 24.
  5. The deluge of Zoom quizzes that have now thankfully died down provided some much-needed structure in the wild wild west of early-days lockdown.

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